Dark was the Night

Lights on or off? How to tackle?

Some persons like the idea of having sex with the lights on. On the other hand, the partner may just not be interested in the proposition. So, how to proceed? Well, there are many reasons why the partner may not be interested in such a proposition. The partner may be uncomfortable with his or her physical fitness. Or, the partner may find you ugly. Of course, chances of the second option being true are remote unless the partner happens to be really desperate for some action.

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Friends with Benefits

My long-standing partner of many years dumped me recently. After a lengthy bout of tears and wailing, and a period of misery and depression, I have bounced back.

Why?

A simple answer. Friends with benefits. Some people call them fuck buddies; but basically this term describes friends who are willing to go beyond the call of friendship, and are willing to spend some time in bed with you. However, most importantly, there are no strings attached.

The two of you are not embarking upon a relationship or expecting anything from each other apart for occasional sex as well as your original friendship. You are not ‘a couple’, or ‘together'in any way. You do not have to go through the rituals of courting, such as romantic gestures and holidays, and meeting the parents, nor do you expect to stay with each other for the rest of your lives.

The whole concept of friends with benefits is a sign of our times. First of all we are now open about our sexuality, and especially about our sexual needs. Women have become empowered enough to be able to express themselves sexually, and men are more willing to listen than in previous generations.

Also, friendships can often be so deep that friends are willing to do anything for each other, including acting as a temporary sexual substitute.

There is even a film about it. Simply but boldly entitled Friends with Benefits, it features top-notch star Justin Timberlake along with Mila Kunis and Woody Harrelson, Patricia Clarkson and Emma Stone.

Billed as a romantic comedy, the film explores today’s issues of sexual relationships without emotional attachments, and gives one idea on whether or not friends with benefits is a lasting option. As for me, I’ll keep you updated.

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Spice It Up: Role-Play

I felt compelled to write this article. Why? Because even though we’ve come a really long way in the past 100 or so years, us humans still have a lot to learn about opening up and actually being honest about what we really want.

And a lot of people want role-play. And it isn’t just me saying it or bending the truth. Go online and you’ll discover hundreds of outlets selling role-play and fetish gear…and I don’t think I need tell you about all the porn sites out there…

So how do you go about bringing your role-playing fantasy up?

Well, you do as follows:

1) Think of it from your partner’s perspective. Are you a joker? Are you dead serious a lot? The way she or he perceives you will impact massively on how able to accept it he or she is. So go carefully if you need to, and don’t just jump straight in there and say it.

2) Consider investigating role-play first yourself: you may have already done this. Gone to a sex-shop and checked it out. Do so. This will give you info so that when you tell your partner, she or he knows you are serious.

3) Expect laughter. You laugh when you hear about obese people on pole dancing courses , so why wouldn’t he or she laugh when, out of the blue, you tell her this? Prepare and it’ll be easier.

4) You’ve been thinking about this for ages, so don’t fall into the classic mistake of thinking that he or she must have noticed something by now, and they know more than they actually do. This will lead to an argument. Arguments are just another barrier!

5) Suggest he or she gets involved too, and make it plain that it’s up to them to decide. There should be no pressure, and that way you both get off on the right foot.

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Keeping That Love Fire Burning

Staring at the sizzling bacon squirming in its juices, is it any wonder that you can suddenly find yourself thinking of…more exotic things? Mornings are the ideal time to make those things happen, but what do you do when your burgeoning sex-drive meets an unwelcome brick wall in the shape of a tired or drowsy partner? You follow the following essential advice, of course:

1) wake him or her up with a sexy breakfast. We’re talking pineapple, grapes, whatever they love the most and champagne to top it all off.

2) Or why not don some stunning underwear? Nothing makes an unbothered partner move faster than a racy outfit which you’ve been promising to show them for ages…and let’s face it, wouldn’t you be the same if the tables were turned?

3) Waking them up with an awesome surprise is another way of making things heat up VERY quickly. You know what your partner loves, so give it to them tenderly, and before you know it you’ll both be in a whole ’nother world…

4) book the day off work as a surprise. The number 1 reason for sex-drives diminishing is lack of time. Booking a day off solves that problem in a heart-beat, leaving you the rest of the day to get up to sexy fun and games that you’ve got all planned out! It doesn’t matter what your partner loves – dominatrix or dirty talking – with all that time on your hand you’re sure to get that love-fire burning…

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How to tie someone up sexually

Women have many fantasies. Some of them involve them being completely dominated. This can be small and simple from being told what to do, to full degradation such as being pissed on having shit smothered over their skin before being fucked.

Some of them like to be hurt, sometimes this is simple use of pain as pleasure – using the hot wax of candles is a classic example of how to do this without permanently damaging the person. For some women this isn’t enough however, and only real blood and breaking of the flesh will suffice.
Some of them involve being in charge and being the dominatrix. Being the domme is all important to them, and this will go from deciding what happens right through to whips, chains and putting their men into cages.

Something that is more common that you think however is being tied up. This is fantasy shared by both men and women – though it is girls who tend to prefer being the ones tied up. Being completely dominated and then ravished by a man is every girls dream on some level, and the restraint of real bonds only serves to escalate what can happen verbally on a day to day basis.
So things to bear in mind:

• It is not only about the actual bonds, if you don’t back it up with strength, it won’t be a turn on.
• As well as rope, consider scarves or something softer if this is your first time. It will hold the person down just as strongly.
• Verbalise it. Use words to reinforce their “helplessness”
• Have a safe word. If it gets out of hand you might stop prematurely when they are actually enjoying themselves, so the safe word will not stop you – but instead allow you to go much further than you otherwise would.

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Something old..something new…

Being in love is a wonderful feeling, knowing that you have someone in your life that cares about you for all of your faults and idiosyncrasies gives many people a content feeling. While love in a relationship is important, equally important is the type of sex that a couple has. When it comes to sex and love, for a lot of people it conjures up the image of romantic candle lit love making, but seldom do people think about the down and dirty business of a good fuck. It is entirely possible to have both a wonderful loving relationship as well as some raunchy sex in the bedroom.
In the beginning of my relationship it was certainly all about the sex, getting to know each other and putting on the “dating face”. However, being together for a long time has left a little to be desired when it comes to our sex life. My wife and I have always been very open minded people, so when things began to slide in the boudoir we formulated a plan to get back on track with what had been a very healthy sex life. When our issues began we tried the more traditional tactics like doing some role playing and using new types of toys, and while it worked for a while we still felt that something was missing.
My wife surprised me by suggesting that we consider a ménage a trios, after all is was something neither of us had done before. After some discussion between us my wife called a London Escort Agency to arrange for an escort. Our escort came directly to our home, (as my wife was more comfortable here than at a hotel) and after a drink, some get to know you chit chat we got down to business. It was the most amazing experience that either of us (my wife and I) had ever had. While the sex that was had with our escort was great, it paled in comparison to what happened after she left.
Having a threesome has changed everything between my wife and me for the better. We are still madly in love and have discovered things about each other that we never would have known. I’m grateful that my wife made the suggestion and that we followed through. So, if you are looking for a new twist in your sex life, trying a threesome just might do the trick.

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When 3 is not a crowd……

As a relationship ages many times so does the ability to come up with new and exciting ways to keep the passion alive. For couples that are looking to reignite the flame, but are tired of store bought toys, gadgets and role playing get ups than maybe it is time to look at other ways to breathe the life back into your sex life.
For many couples that need something more, why not consider finding a fuck buddy to help spice things up in the bedroom? Realistically, a FB is nothing more than another tool that can be used to help make your sex life exciting again. However, it is not as simple as just picking out a dildo from a porn shop shelf. You and your partner need to talk about what your expectations are for your FB. Are you looking for a one night stand fuck buddy or more of a long term type? A long term FB is a good option only after your initial experience, so that you know if it is something that you and your partner enjoy, but you should only choose someone that you would possibly want to be with again just in case you are inclined to do it on a more regular basis. Another thing to consider when looking for a FB is gender, do you and your significant other want a male fuck buddy or is another female more your style? It seems the trend in the early on of threesomes, that another woman is the preference. Maybe it is because there is not as much issue with dominance between women, but whatever the case you should choose based on a mutually agreed preference. The final and most important thing to discuss when contemplating a FB in your bedroom is ground rules. You and your partner as well as the intended fuck buddy should discuss what is expected of each person and what the rules are in AND out of the bedroom.
Once you have made your choice, had the necessary discussions, and prepared yourselves, than having that third person in your bed can be one of the best experiences of your lives.

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Dirty sex for beginners

It is quite nice to be in love. However being in love and making love doesn’t necessarily mean that you shouldn’t experiment with your sex life. At first, most couples usually practise more traditional, tender sex. This is explained by the fact that they are just in the beginning of their relationship and they are still getting used to each other. Making love is all about connecting on a higher level. However, each one of us is special and unique and it takes quite a lot of time for this connection to be made. Nevertheless, with time your relationship grows stronger, just like your sex life. But still, strangely enough, naughty or dirty sex is not something that we all like. So what are you supposed to do in order to find out if your fuck buddy is comfortable with such experiments? Well the best thing to do is to start with something rather casual. A good idea is to slap your partner gently and watch for his/her reaction. If you get negative feedback forget about it. Don’t try to push your partner too hard as this may ruin your relationship. If, however your lover reacts positively to the slapping, this is a sign that you can continue with the dirty games and you can even use two lather slappers for more intense pleasure. It should all happen very naturally. One thing will lead to another and soon you will establish a clear ground rules what you like and what you don’t.

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It’s all about sex

It is all about the sex. You wake up in the morning feeling incredibly horny, but as you have to go to work you don’t really have the time to play. Then during your long day at work all you can think about is how you are going to go back home and strip your wife and make all the things you want with her. When you finish work you speed home, maybe you will stop at the local supermarket to buy some wine, or chocolate, whatever works for you. And then you open the front door, you see your wife doing something and you just grab her tight and you say to her: Honey, I was thinking about you. Yes, those days are typical for the sexually active. But after all this planning you need to make sure that you perform at your best. So how to become a Sex machine? It’s not going to be easy but here are some starting tips. First of all you need to know your body. Some men get horny when they drink alcohol; others feel the exact opposite effect. Some like to eat chocolate or watch porn. You need to know what makes you horny and what not. Then you need to know your partner very well. Her “spots” of pleasure, the way she likes it, rough of gentle, you need to know her body better than your own. Because when that happens the sexual act grows from being a simple exercise to a magnificent love act that connects two souls. You can even tattoo her name on your arm, and don’t worry if you split up – there are lots of tattoo removal clinics in London. And yeah, you need to spice up your sex life constantly, use toys, talk dirt, and wear some provocative costumes. As someone once said if the sex is not dirty you are making it wrong.

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